Is this the end?

Dear Journal,

 

The other day at school I overheard someone talking about how they were shoved up against the lockers, so I planned on being there at the same time the next day. I showed up to confront the bullies expecting everything to be normal. But when I had to step up to the bullies because they wouldn’t back down, I was so weak. They laughed at my attempt to push them away. Then, their efforts switched to me. This was the first time I had been bullied in my life. Sure, I’ve felt left out before. I’ve always been the smartest, and now in this new school I was the smartest and the youngest. It didn’t help that I basically made myself look like a chihuahua–all bark and no bite. Before I knew it I was on the floor curled up into a ball, hoping they would leave me alone, but then feeling another kick to my ribs, then another to my back. There wasn’t anything I could do. Thankfully, the kid I was trying to help had run and gotten a teacher. He must not have had a lot of faith in my abilities, but then again looking at me curled up on the floor proved his point.

 

Then today, I went to take a test in AP Chemistry and I studied like I always do- two games of madden, followed up YouTube videos until I pass out. It’s a proven recipe for success, I always get A’s on my tests. But, today was different. I picked up my pencil and stared at the paper like it was an alien language, because if it was in Spanish, I still would have understood it. It took me almost the whole class period to realize I didn’t “just know it.” With ten minutes left, I filled in the bubbles on the scantron sheet in a cool design, turned it in and headed to the bus to come home.

 

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I can’t imagine what life would be like without my powers. I only remember being strong and genius. I don’t know what this new life will bring me. What about the kids that are continuing to be bullied? Who will help them? I’m going to have to figure something out, but how does some regular kid make a difference?

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